Someone Named Paula & Her Father, Al, Consider Their Options (Variation #2)

SOMEONE NAMED PAULA & HER FATHER, AL, CONSIDER THEIR OPTIONS
(Variation #2)

PAULA and AL are in a car at night, stuck in traffic.

PAULA
You aren't allowed to read my mind anymore.

AL
I–

PAULA
You aren't–
It isn't fair–
Please stop.

AL
…

PAULA
Okay?

AL
…
I didn't think you knew.

PAULA
…

AL
…
Alright.
I guess I did.

PAULA
:/
Okay?
You can't anymore. Dad.

AL
I heard you.
Would you like to listen to some music?

PAULA
No.
Do you promise?

AL
Okay.
I promise.

PAULA
Thank you.

AL
Can you promise me something?

PAULA
…
What?

AL
Please never lie to me.

PAULA
–I haven't.
Why?

AL
Everybody lies, Paula.

PAULA
They do…

AL
Just…
I need to hear you say it.

PAULA
I can't.

AL
Oh…

PAULA
I can't promise that. I could. But–

AL
I don't like being lied to.

PAULA
I know.

AL
And yet everybody does it.

PAULA
I know.

AL
You'd be surprised how often...

PAULA
…
It must be hard knowing that.

AL
Depends on the lie.
…
Sometimes.
Sometimes it depends on the lie.
Most times, its just the lying; the
looking-me-straight-in-my-face…
"I didn't see you waiting for the spot."
"Well I was and yes you did."
"I didn't, I'm sorry."
"Yes you did don't apologize, move yr car."
Then they rummage around in
their brain for the perfect mean thing…
Stuff like that…

PAULA
Did mom know?

AL
I don't think so…

PAULA
Did she lie a lot?

AL
No more than anyone else.

PAULA
What about?
That's not helping.
That won't do anything.

AL
I know. I know…
But it's nice thinking it does.
Wanna give it a try?

PAULA
No. It's obnoxious.

AL
It's kind of fun.

PAULA
No.
Thank you.
:/

AL
Suit yourself.

PAULA
// Dad I–

AL
You sure you don't–?
What was that?

PAULA
… :(

AL
Paula?

PAULA
:'(

AL
Hey.
What's going on?

PAULA
The moon…

AL
Oh…

PAULA
What am I supposed to do with it?

AL
About it?

PAULA
To it.

AL
We can, um…

PAULA
It won't go away.

AL
What does it feel like?

PAULA
Um…
I–
I don't–

AL
Does it hurt?

PAULA
No. No. It–

AL
What does it feel like?

PAULA
Full.
I mean…
It feels full, my chest.
And it's–
Chilly. And…
Like, I'm pulling everything around me.
Like, I keep bumping into things…
Things keep bumping into me.
I feel clumsy, stupid.
And cold. And full.
And sad.
And–

AL
You aren't stupid.

PAULA
I know.

AL
You're very smart.

PAULA
I know I am.

AL
Kids don't just get // an intern–

PAULA
I'm not a kid dad.

AL
Of course you are.

PAULA I'm not.
Dad.
I'm not.

AL
Alright–

PAULA
I'm not.

AL
…
You just were.
I could've sworn.
Just now…

PAULA
I don't want it anymore.

AL
It has the most beautiful view.
Just so you know.
You could see everything from it.

PAULA
Dad–

AL
And I mean everything.

PAULA
Please–

AL
The view is so clear.
You can see our house from there.

PAULA
No, you couldn't–

AL
I swear.
I swear you could.
It was right there.
I could see it and…
I could see me.
And I could see you.
And, mom was there too.

PAULA
What were we doing?

AL
We were having dinner.
Or… you were in the yard.
Mom was showing you the garden.
You were tiny then.

PAULA
Where were you?

AL
Upstairs I guess or…
No then we were putting up decorations.
For Halloween.
And you were a pumpkin, no,
you were an M&M, sorry, no
you were a genie, and
you were a ninja, and
you were a vampire, and
you were a vampire again, and
you were a box of cereal, and
you were a vampire again, and
then a mummy, and
then we had dinner and then
you got stuck in a tree and then
mom showed you the garden and
you were so small and then we lit off
fireworks and then we watched TV and
there were decorations, and we
sat on the porch
and passed out candy…and…

PAULA
What?

AL
Nothing.

PAULA
Dad.

AL
…

PAULA
I need you to tell me.

AL
Then.
…
The three of us got in a car.
…
And the two of us came home.

PAULA
What else did you see?

AL
Didn't look at anything else.
…
(!) :(

PAULA
This sucks.

AL
Yup.

PAULA leans over and lays on the horn…

PAULA
…
You were right. >:)

AL
…
Would you like to–

PAULA
Yes.

PAULA honks the horn more. AL joins. PAULA opens her window, leans out–

PAULA (cont'd)
Move!
C'mon already!
Chop chop!
Let's get this show on the road.
Move!

PAULA sits back down, proud, amused. AL is gone, the cowboy hat in his seat. PAULA picks it up.

PAULA (cont'd)
Dad?
…
DAD!
…

AL appears somewhere else.

AL
Pssst. :)

PAULA
You scared the shit out of me.
What're you doing?

AL
C'mere.

PAULA
What?

AL
I found something.

PAULA
What?

AL
I found it.
We gotta hurry.
It's right over here.

PAULA
What is it?

AL
We gotta go…
C'mon.

PAULA gets up. Follows her dad off…